|(Banana cream pie that I made with fresh berries and corn on the Cob from the farmer’s market)|
Recently, my little family took a trip down to what I always refer to as “home”, NYC. It’s strange how even though I lived in Rochester for my first 18 years of life, it’s those years from 18 to 26 that I lived in NYC, that I finally felt like I was home. There is just something about my life in the city that made me feel like I belonged and that it was the right fit for me. I guess the biggest reason for this is that I was finally among what I considered my peers. People who had strong creative passions and entrepreneurial dreams, not much desire to work for someone else or “the man” as they say. These thoughts are frowned upon by most members of my family and acquaintances in Rochester and that’s a big deal for me because it feels like a very negative attitude towards me and my goals in life. In a way I feel very stifled living here because of this attitude that seems to surround me. It seems like every time I’m in a groove and trying to get some work done, there is somebody interrupting me and they never understand when I tell them I’m busy or I’m working. The idea that someone could be working while at home seems to be ridiculous to them and they never take me seriously or understand that I’m doing something important and because of this about 75% of my time ends up wasted because of stupid useless phone calls I’m answering or somebody knocking uninvited on the door or somebody shouting at my office window from the house next door, which happens very often because it’s my mother. Yeah that’s right, I’m finally admitting the truth. I live right next door to my mother and yeah like most people would assume, it is a very real version of hell.
Anyway getting to my point in all of this, I’ve been going back and forth in my mind for the last few years on the idea of where we should be living. I often feel torn between the idea of living back in NYC or getting a house someplace more rural with a few acres of land and a barn where we can be as loud as we want and do whatever we want, whenever we want, without hearing the nagging sound of a neighbor complaining. On one hand there is the promise of a strong creative community with lots of events and classes and things that I can fill my time with while pursuing my creative goals and the promise of culture and music and good food and friends and museums and playgrounds and glimpses of the ocean and public transportation. And on the other hand there is the promise of solitude and quiet and loads of space and no pesky neighbors to eavesdrop on our conversations and watch our every move from their windows.
So, during our 7 hour bus trip down to NYC I looked out the windows and began weighing my options trying to make up my mind once and for all about what was best for me and my little family. With every farmhouse or cow field we drove by along the way, I began to feel like one side of the scale was finally tipping. By the time we reached NYC I knew my mind was almost made up and that this trip was going to give me just the insight I needed to make a decision. This was the first time that I was really getting to spend some quality time in the city with Mia there as well. Usually she stays home with a babysitter when we go to the city. I can honestly say that after 7 long, hot days there I was very ready to go home. It’s really just too hard with a kid, that’s the plain and simple reason. Me and The Mister would be fine but it was just too much walking and too many trains and people for Mia to deal with. I’m sure if we moved back there she would adjust to it and everything would be fine but then it goes back to the question of “is this what’s best for my little family?” and the answer is No. it’s not what’s best for Mia.
So the scale finally tipped enough that it became evident that we are better suited to country living. Going along with that realization is the fact that the past 6 months or so I have had a huge desire for a more simple life. I’ve been longing for more peace and quiet, more space to spread out outdoors and less belongings and materialism to hold us down. I love the idea of a barn or an out building to use as a studio, and a yard that goes so far you can’t see your neighbors and you have enough space for a pool, throwing bonfires, a large vegetable garden and raspberry bushes, maybe a chicken coop and a barn cat. Also more cooking, less eating out. More baked goods, more cook outs, more privacy. So, this is my new goal in life. I’m sure it won’t happen for many years but I will be doing little things everyday to help work toward that hefty goal. So the simplification process begins…